Mr. T Treat your mother right

Tribute to a Hero

Ok, so im a huge fan of southpark. but who doesn't know Eric Cartman, the biggest spoiled kid in the world. A lot of people says im pretty much like cartman, in fact i ussualy use his quotes to express myself.

Cartman (usually only addressed by his last name or some pejorative term; only his "mother" Liane Cartman and adults such as Chef address him as Eric) is spoiled, foul-mouthed, ill-tempered, racist, insensitive, manipulative, sadistic, greedy – and considerably obese (thus giving rise to the pejorative names "fat ass" or "ass master" by which he is often referred). It can also be assumed he is a sociopath as he said to Guidance Counselor Mr. Mackey that he finds people dying funny. Generally speaking, he has exhibited at one time or another every negative trait that can be found in a human being, or expressed a desire to do so. Cartman, however, does not consider himself a bad person at all.

Some Cartman Trivia:

According to the South Park calendar, Eric Cartman's birthday is July 1st.
Cartman is the 2nd oldest of the four boys.
"Cartman" is the codename for Red Hat Linux version 6.1.
According to the episode "The Succubus", Cartman has the eyes of the 32nd Kenny.
Cartman has only one kidney. The other is inside of Kyle, because they are the only two in South Park who share the AB negative blood type. It was transplanted into Kyle against Cartman's will, and despite his efforts to prevent this by installing a "Kidney Blocker 2000", in the 4th season episode Cherokee Hair Tampons.
Cartman is the only one of the four main boys whose middle name has been revealed on the show. (Theodore)
Cartman was originally called Kenny in the prototype clip of South Park called "Jesus vs Frosty".
In the Japanese language dub of South Park, Cartman is voiced by LILIKO
Cartman's voice was featured in episode 65 of MTV Cribs and in the film Duplex
A photorealistic version of Cartman's appearance was produced as a police artist sketch for the episode Free Willzyx (see).
In an episode of the Powerpuff Girls, Blossom is thrown into a coat rack and appears in Cartman's attire. She then says "He tripped me, seriously."
Cartman seems to have difficulty telling the difference between the French and the English as he constantly calls Pip French when he is English and he calls the Mole English when he is actually French.
As seen on "Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow" and "Cartoon Wars Part II" Cartman carries with him an unloaded gun.
In the episode "Wing", during the scene in which Token becomes a client of the "Super Awsome Talent Agency", you can see that the mouse of Cartman's computer is on the left side of the computer, implying that he is left handed. However, in the same episode, Cartman is seen handling his G36 assault rifle with his right hand on the grip and left hand on the hand guard, and thus may be ambidextrous.
In the episode "Tom's Rhinoplasty", he claims to have Dutch-Irish ancestry - "My grandma was Dutch-Irish and my grandpa was lesbian, that makes me quarter lesbian!"


And My Personal Favorite: Eric Cartman's quotes.

Cartman: I would never let a woman kick my ass. If she tried something, I'd be like, HEY! You get your bitch ass back in the kitchen and make me some pie!

Cartman: It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a women's separation; this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.

Cartman: You seem a little irritable, Kyle. You got some sand in your vagina?
Kyle: There's no sand in my vagina!

Cartman: How 'bout we sing, 'Kyle's Mom is a stupid bitch' in D Minor.

Mr. Garrison: Who was in charge of the feminist movement of the early '60's?
Cartman: A bunch of fat old skanks on their periods.
Mr. Garrison: Right. But who was the fattest, oldest skank on her period?

Cartman: Well, I've been lickin' this carpet for 3 whole hours and I don't feel like a lesbian.

Cartman: Shut up Kyle! Shut your Goddamn' Jew mouth! You're the reason that there's war in the Middle East.

Cartman: I used to think disabled people were here for my amusement.

Cartman: I'm not fat! I'm festivally plump!

Cartman: I hate hippies! I mean, the way they always talk about "protectin' the earth" and then drive around in cars that get poor gas mileage and wear those stupid bracelets - I hate 'em! I wanna kick 'em in the nuts!

Cartman: I don't hate black people. I hate hippies.

Cartman: French people piss me off.

Cartman: Hippies.They're everywhere. They wanna save the earth, but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad.


Take Care, Carlos

About Planes and Me...

Hey. I'm back. Today was a busy day.. but you are not gonna know about it. Unless you want to know. Do you? OK.. if you insist! Anyways.
I went to a Travel Agency to get tickets to go to Brazil on summer. Everything was working fine. I went to an ATM, dried out my bank account, took all the cash i could and, old-fasion style, finnaly got to the travel agency with my mind on my money and my money on my mind, my pockets, sorry. Suddenly, out of the blue, when the girl that works there was scaring me with this really expensive fares and taxes and airport charges and a bunch of stuff.. when my pockets were sweting, i saw my mum walking in the sidewalk. My chance to get my tickets for free. So i started yielding really loud, but she didnt hear me. She hates cellphones. I had no choice but get out of the store, grab her arm and drag her into the store. She was stucked inthere sitting with me now.
This is the point when you say to your parents: Remember when I was 15 and I asked you if i could go to Rio and you said "once you turn 21"? im 22 now so.. pay your debt.
Of course i didn't say that before, but she thought i did. So, at 11 am i was suffering to get a 2 am flight and at 11 20 am i was booking the perfect flight, getting to choose dates, time, i even chose the window. For free. Im happy now.

I have to admit i hate flying. If buses were faster, or boat services were more efficient, i think i wouldnt ever flight. Last time i did, it was awfull.
I was obligated to go to Arica to play in a Rugby seven-a-side tournament in the Beach. So Cocacola, our main sponsor, booked us in this crapy peruvian aeroline, Aerocontinente. The advantage was that we could confirm till the last minute. But, besides that, nothing good. We had our first game at 2 pm, so we were suposed to fly overthere at 5 am. at 4 30, at the airport, this guy from the kitchen tell us that aerocontinente wasnt flying because a wheel was broken. So lame excuse.
After that they started the show. The screen said: 10 am. then 12. then 1 pm. Later 4 pm. Finally, at 7 pm, no excuses, they put us on a crappy plane. we landed in La serena, Calama, Antofagasta, Iquique and, finally, Arica. In the flight, they gave us a little box with a sandwich on it. I ate mine and traded it with the old lady sitting next to me that was deeply sleeping. she asked later why her box was empty, i answered "this crappy airline". we got to arica at 4 am. 23 hours travelling for a 2000 km trip. But that wasnt over. Arica sucked. in the tournament we did awfull. It was 3 teams from argentina, 4 from peru, 2 from the north and us. We lost every single game. We werent used to play in SAND. anyways.
Not everything was bad. We were walking downtown and we saw this pet store. This rare fish in an aquarium. I asked to the owner and he answered: "HOW COME DONT YOU KNOW THAT IS AN STINGRAY! YOU IGNORANT BRATS!". Later that day i went again with glasses and hat. and asked again. Same answer. So i say: "No, thats not an stingray". The guy got so mad he actually inserted his hand in the aquarium to probe me he could get shocked. you figure what happened. I laught for like 45 minutes.

The last day, i bought a piece of cake and chocolate at the beach. it was good. 4 hours later, i was pucking my ass off in the toilet. i dehidrated and had to travel vomiting the entire flight. the flight attender, instead of asking how was i doing, was screaming me for the vomit in the sit.
Then i got to Santiago. Never flew again. Till jan 12. Lets see what happens. Bye Carlos.

My day?

Hi. nobody read the last thing i wrote. they read the warnings. cool. i was thinking today.. (yes, i think sometimes) why people have this "blogs". i mean, when i was younger, girls had diaries.. i don't know what was in there but, it was supoused to be a secret, maybe that's why. this "blogs" aren't diaries. I don't write "dear blog, i met this girl today..." and all that girly stuff, but i've read the blog instructions and i'm supoused to write abot myself, my day. i think, to whome? who wants to read about me? I do. ok, everybody is invited, this isn't a secret like those old diaries.

Anyway, im just remembering when i met this girl.. i mean i didn't meet her..... I was on my way to the movies and i saw her.. she was beautifull. she was inside a bookstore, so i got in there. I thought, "maybe i can talk to her" "this can't be that hard" "She is way out of my ligue"... she was there, reading one of my favourites writers, nicanor parra.. i stand next to her for.. probably two or three minutes. I coudn't talk to her. she left the store and, i don't know why, but i followed her a couple of blocks. she probably was thinking that i wanted to rape her. i didn't by the way. She took her bike and left. maybe home, maybe to her boyfriend's house, i don't know. i went to the movies.. thinking what could have happened if i had spoken to her. then the movie begun and i forgot her. I am writing this because i am bored.. bye.

Ok, so the truth... Curiyork City

W.M.D.

A lot of people is wondering why im hiding in the south. well not a lot. ok, lest start over. A few guys are wondering why im here in the cold south. Is not an exiting city, we have no cool clubs, no mcdonalds, no lot of stuff. well. i think its time to tell the truth, and here it goes, but dont go telling. it a secret. a cool secret.
Do you know this guy, Saddam? he is a good friend of mine, came over for dinner a couple of months ago before going to Disneyland, as he said. I asked him for a souvenir, but he still hasnt come back. anyways, Saddam and i are developing Weapons of Mass Destruction, right here in the south.. cool ah? how awesome is that. If you know me, then you know a guy who develops WMD with uncle saddam. We have this plan to take over the world. Its really simple, we create an alternative world and encourage everybody to go over. How? ok this is the interesting part. We give you a free T-shirt if you go there. Ok, i know its a copy... Pinky and the brain did it. Well, it was the only time they actually conquered the world. Why not to copy it. Ok, right now you are thinking... is carlos on drugs? the answer is no. im just bored. i just got to find out that this "blogs" are everywere so i wanted to make one. now.. its better start it off with an exiting story instead of he true... that eventually ill write. You should have read and obey the first post i made. You are not welcome here. But if you insist.. c ya, Carlos

Not Welcome

hi. i don't know what is worst, my computer skills or my english, so this is a really weird experience. is the first time i write about myself. i hope only a few people read this, so.. better nobody, get out of here, ok? just push the Back button now. is right up there, on the left side... ok, if you didn't do it you are gonna have to read this booooring blog. ok? i am warning you! you have 10 seconds. 9. 8. 7... ok, if you are reading this part means that you don't have anything else to do but to read my life. i wont write about myself today, so you've wasted like... 2 minutes of your life? meanwhile you are reading this i am doing exiting stuffs, like a nap or something. go and do something too! jaja. try next year. sorry. bye. Carlos